July 29, 2012

Never Date Action Hero Daughters

That’s Maggie Grace. Beautiful woman. She played Kim, Bryan Mills’ daughter, in Taken. Clearly, any guy would love to have her wrapped around his arm, but there’s one tiny problem: BRYAN MILLS!!!

Can you imagine the fear that would go through your body knowing that Liam Neeson was her father? I’d be pissing my pants and looking in every street corner to avoid him. He does have a particular set of skills that make him a nightmare for a guy like me. You would probably carry his daughter around in The Popemobile in order to avoid any harm onto her.

Same goes for every action hero’s daughter. Lucy McClane, Darian Hallenback, and Jenny Matrix. Those are names where if you met them in adulthood, you should run. Run as far as you can. Don’t let the good looks draw you in because their fathers will take your life by the throat and make it their playtoy. They will scare you, intimidate you, and keep off sex for eternity which is hard since they are all played by hot actresses. Would you turn down Mary Elizabeth Winstead? I don’t think so.

I can just imagine Thanksgiving dinner or Christmas with John Matrix or John McClane. John Matrix crushes crackers (over soup) with an “I will kill you” face on. John McClane making jabs at your life and lack of a job. A double edged sword by any word. It would be awesome to have any of them as a father in law in a way, but dammit it would be hell on your sex life.

About the Author

My name is Omar and I love action movies. I grew up loving action films thanks in part to my father who would deliver a healthy dose of Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Willis, and Seagal in my movie diet. Ever since then, I continue to love the genre more and more and go along perfectly with my love for the horror genre. What other movie genre can specialize in giving you pure adrenaline and excitement in every turn?



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