Top 10

November 21, 2012
 

10 of the Best: Christmas Action Movies

Nothing says “Christmas” like shoot-outs, explosions and badass one liners, so here’s some of my personal holiday favourites.

Yule love it! Yeah, I said it, shut up.

 

 

 

 

 

  1. Die Hard:  “Now I have a machine gun. Ho, Ho, Ho.” John McClane makes sure Hans Gruber’s Christmas is anything but a silent night by being a “fly in the ointment, the pain in the ass.” And we all love him for it.
  2. Lethal Weapon:  The best buddy movie ever; opening scene has a naked chick (score) who quickly jumps off a balcony (fail) leaving Riggs and Murtaugh to clean up the mess.  Awesome one-liners, gratuitous violence and Gibbo “playing crazy” before he actually went crazy.
  3. The Last Boy Scout: Bruce Willis’s other Christmas movie doesn’t get enough love but when Satan Claus is always watching then I guess you’d better be careful; Shane Black has an obsession with Christmas and all of his movies are set during it. The script is on sparkling form here and Willis has never been cooler.
  4. First Blood: This is indeed set around Christmas and what better way to celebrate the birth of Christ then battling for survival against a slightly obsessive Sheriff who really wants you dead. God bless us, everyone!
  5. Invasion USA:  We all enjoy Christmas, a time for families to rejoice in love and happiness, unless you’re one of those damn Commies, in which case you hatch a ridiculous plan to invade the good ole US of A. Unfortunately they failed to realise that Chuck Norris may have a problem with that. So he decides to spread some Christmas Cheer (and their brains) all over the sidewalk. USA USA USA!
  6. The Long Kiss Goodnight:  Geena Davis would love Christmas, if only she could remember when the hell it was. But that’s alright cos she’s gonna kick the ass out of anyone who gets in the way of her or her family. She’s also gonna do it with the help of a wise-cracking Samuel L. Jackson.
  7. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang: The Underrated Christmas gem is more of a comedy than an action movie but who cares? It’s Val Kilmer and Downey Jr. on sparkling form. “Are you still gay?” “Nah I’m up to my knees in pussy, I just love the name.”
  8. Batman Returns: The Penguin and Catwoman can’t put a dampener on Bruce Wayne’s Christmas, despite their best efforts. At the time this was considered a disappointment but it has stood the test of time very well and Michelle Pfeiffer remains THE best Catwoman. Sorry Anne.
  9. Behind Enemy Lines: Everyone wants to be home for Christmas but poor Owen Wilson just wants to be alive in this underrated actioner.
  10. I Come in Peace: Dolph exterminates an evil alien and carves his ass like he was a turkey.

 

I’ve never seen Reindeer Games, thus it is not on the list.

 



About the Author

Eoin Friel
Eoin Friel
I grew up watching JCVD, Sly and Arnold destroy bad guys, blow things up and spew one-liners like it's a fashion statement. Action is everything I go to the movies for and the reason I came up with this site is to share my love for the genre with everyone.



 
 

 

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